Songs My Father Taught Me

My dad had a few songs and poems he knew: the Sunday School Song; I'll Tell you ABout a Buglar Bold; I Went to see my Grandma, One Cold and Wintry Day, etc.

Singing those songs with the Brooks kids, I have had to refresh my memory on some of the verses  from the Baptist Sunday School Song, which I now call the Mormon Sunday School Song, so as not to confuse my grandchildren.  This may not be enough to stop them from getting confused though I am trying.

There are 125 stanzas. I have selected only a few to teach, for reasons that will be clear if you look at the blueness of some of the other stanzas in the link to the original song.  Sing away, but I ought not teach some of those lyrics to a five year old.

So here it is.  Arta's expergated and revised Ba[tost Sunday School song that her father sang to her.

The Baptist Sunday School

Chorus:
Young folks, old folks, everybody come
Join the Baptist Sunday School, and have a lot of fun
Please to leave your chewing gum and razors at the door
And you'll hear some Bible stories that you've never heard before

Verses:

3. God made Satan, Satan made sin
God made a hot place to keep Satan in
Satan didn't like it so he said he wouldn't stay
He's been acting like the devil ever since that day

7. Adam was the first man that ever was invented
He lived all his life and never was contented
He was made of clay in the days gone by
And hung on a fence in the sun to dry

18. Adam was a gardener and Eve was his spouse
They got the sack for stealing fruit and took to keeping house
They lived a very quiet life and peaceful in the main
'Til Eve had a baby and they started raising Cain

21. Cain he raised potatoes and he peddled 'em in town
Abel called him hayseed every time he came around
Cain he laid a stick o' wood on brother Abel's head
And when he took the stick away, he found poor Able dead.

26. Methuselah got famous, for he refused to die
"When ya gonna croak?" they asked, he answered, "Bye and bye!"
And when they pressed him for the date, Methuzy whispered "Hush!"
Then laughing thru his whiskers, he hollered "What's the rush?"

33. Along came Noah walkin' in the dark
He stumbled over a hammer and buit himself an Ark
In came the animals two by two
The Hippokangaramus and the Hippokangaroo

46. Pharaoh had a daughter with a most bewitching smile
Who found the baby Moses in the rushes by the Nile
She took him to her father who said That's a likely tale,
It's just about as probable as Jonah and the whale
55a. Shadrak, Meshak, and Abednigo
Wouldn't obey the king, so they had to go
Put 'em in a furnace to burn 'em up like chaff
But their asbestos B.V.D.s gave the king a laugh

55b. Meshach, Shadrach and Abednego
Told the King of Babylon where he could go
He put them in the furnace, and gave the door a slam
But they wore asbestos BVD's and didn't give a....hoot
59. Joseph was a shepherd lad the Bible stories tell us
His golf coat was so stunning that it made his brothers jealous
So they sold him into Egypt for a small consideration
Where he made a million dollars on a big grain speculation
64. Joshua was a jazz cat - the greatest ever born
The wall of Jericho fell down when he blew on his horn
Pursuing all his enemies, he made the sun stand still
The sun it wouldn't listen, so he nailed it to a hill!

65. Here comes Ruth just looking all around
Just like the girls in my home town
Didn't wear any lipstick, or powder on her nose
But she got a fella, as everybody knows!

70. Sampson was a strong man of the John L. Sullivan school
Killed a thousand Phillistines with the jawbone of a mule
Along came Delilah who filled him up with gin
Slashed off his hair and the coppers run him in.

77. Esau was a cowboy of a wild and woolly make
His father left a farm to him, and half to brother Jake
Esau thought his title to the land was none too clear
So he sold it all to Jakey for a burger and a beer.

83. David was a shepherd boy, his mother's pride and joy
His dad gave him a sling shot; a harmless little toy
Along came Goliath a-lookin' for a fuss
David heaved a cobblestone and caved in his crust.

92. Daniel was a shepherd boy got sassy with the king
The king said he'd stand for no such a thing
Put him in a den with lions underneath
But Daniel was a dentist and he pulled the lions' teeth

100. King Solomon and King David lived merry, merry lives
With many, many lady friends and many, many wives
But when old age came upon them with many, many qualms
Solomon wrote the Proverbs and David wrote the Psalms

116. Salome was a dancer, she danced the hoochy-kooch.
She made a hit with Herod, 'cause she didn't wear too mooch.
Said Herod, "Salome, dear, you'll raise a scandal here."
Said Salome, "I don't give a [darn]," and kicked the chandelier.

121. Jesus had a problem, how to feed five thousand folk,
Would he have a runnin' buffet, or a purvey in a poke,
He turned to the disciples, says, "What do you think they'd wish,"
Andrew says "It's Friday Lord, ye'll have tae gie them fish"

Final Verse

125. Now, good folks, we've told you all the dope;
We're sure we've done you lots of good, at least, that's what we hope.
Methuselah wrote these very words when he was but a youth,
And we have it from the old boy that every word's the truth!