Embarking on Adventure

 

I broke my arm Dec 3, 2020.
Today is the first day since then that
I have been able to pull my hair back
and twist it behind my head.
This was my goodbye to pigtails day.
Such happiness, being able to do one's own hair.

Sunday morning, I described some examples of nausea that I have been having to Catherine, and she said that since some of the symptoms I was describing present themselves with secondary heart events, that I should go to the hospital.

She texted me exactly what it is that I should tell the doctor at the emergency department, and which tests I should get, since she had already done the initial interview with me.

After an ECG, lots of blood work and an MRI, the doctor came into the room to give me a preliminary report.

I phoned Catherine so she could listen along with me.

He said that in the MRI, they had seen a 4 cm x 4.8 cm tumor in my pancreas.

They do not know what it is, but obviously they are concerned and want to rule out pancreatic cancer, so the specialists will call me in a few days and set up a biopsy for me.

All other tests at the hospital were normal.

Whether they rule it out or in -- that is going to be my new adventure.

Now for a fuller description of what happened from a blogging point of view.

It is strange the details that stick in a person’s mind.

I had given a lot of blood at the hospital, been in and out of rooms, back to the main waiting room, a couple of times lost in corridors, finally back in the main waiting room,  and I was called up to give just one more set blood samples, they told me.

I was sitting on the edge of an examining room table and the ER Dr., who had been following me, came in with a set of papers. He said he would give me a preliminary report now and a final report later. I told him I would like to call my daughter who is a Dr. to have her listen in. He said, well, not now, for this is just the preliminary report, but I said, no, she likes to know all the data and I can never remember everything that is told to me.

So, we called her and I set the phone on the side of the bed. He leaned in and told me that they had found a tumour on my pancreas. I asked him if what he was giving me was my exit interview. He didn’t answer that question. He was just still. Catherine asked him something so his answer to my question was deflected and he answered her question. Then he told me that to get a biopsy, they would have to call me back in a few days and he told me how that would be done. I told him I was happy to get it right now, but he said there was no one in the hospital right now that could do it. At about this time, Catherine’s phone went dead and I tried to call her back, but no luck.

Catherine finally called back on Catie’s phone; Catherine asked the Dr to send her some of the reports, to make sure that I had the meds I needed, and to make sure I knew where the next appointment would be held. They talked back and forth about which meds I should take home with me. She told me that at this point, I should ask the Dr. any questions I had. 

My question was, with this kind of diagnosis, will I have 3 weeks to live (about the amount of time my nephew Delyle had which isn’t correct, but the shortness of his sickness did stick with me), or 3 months, or maybe a year and a half as Kelvin had. He said, I am not qualified to answer that question. 

 I liked his answer. 

Then he left the room so I could wait for someone to give me the blood test and I talked with Catherine on the phone. She said, “Well, this is not the bombshell I expected to be dropped on me today.” I felt the same way – a little disappointed that I wasn’t have a new stent put in my heart, or a gall bladder operation instead.  Either would have seemed preferable.

Today has been a day off for me – no doing email, no walk, but still three sets of physio exercises for my shoulder, and I did sauté some very tiny mushrooms in some butter with a little bit of onion and garlic for breakfast. Oh, that tasted so good.

Catherine just wrote to me to tell me that rehearsing “what ifs” takes a lot of energy and for this week, I should focus on getting my nausea under control and seeing the specialist, which I shall do.

No what ifs, and yes, to the idea of embarking on a new adventure.

Arta