I am sharing this post on behalf of Gillian Calder, a long time colleague of Arta's daughter Rebecca, but more importantly a long time friend of Rebecca and Arta's.
Gillian Shares:
11. Unrelenting Joy of Learning
If I may, I wanted to jump into the 80 amazing posts about Arta, and write a little something about her unrelenting joy in learning. As I write the sentence I can imagine taking that in many different directions: what she shares when people are around her (like baking); or travels I have heard about (like cruises), or the various forms of art she has introduced to her families (musicals and galleries), or the way she has been a presence at the law school in classes, for years. Each worthy of a post.
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| Arta and Rebecca |
What I wanted to share was the time that I hosted a workshop at UVic’s law school on polygamy, at a time when the question “what is inherently wrong with polygamy” had yet been posed to the BC Supreme Court in a reference. And so we gathered a host of scholars, from across Canada, the US and Australia, in a realm of disciplines, and had a conversation that went on for several days – with both Rebecca and Arta as part of that team.
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| Gillian and Lori's Book: Polygamy's Right and Wrongs |
After the workshop, we decided to pull the presentations together into a book, and with only the most gentle of asks, convinced Arta to write a chapter. And when it was published, we put her chapter at the heart of the book. And in doing so, we also put care, belonging and community at the core of the manuscript; love turned out to be the animating force of the project.
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| Arta's Chapter: Are They Not Us? |
In the chapter Arta authored she is achingly personal, and doesn’t shy away from the big questions that polygamy poses for a Mormon family. And, yet like Arta herself, her chapter remains gracious, while still being curious, and at moments, a teensy bit naughty. It puts family, faith and feminism, squarely in the mix, while still allowing the reader a hint into an unexplored world.
12. Face Discomfort Head On with Great Research
Gillian shares:
I am grateful that in one of the first big academic projects that I had carriage of, as nerve-wracking as that can be, that Arta agreed to tell and share a story. I also feel lucky that Uumati (my 19 year old) and I have been some of the people in Arta’s orbit, welcomed to the lake, where we were put to work, to bake, or read, or play. And I so appreciate all of the times she sends an email after a conversation to ask one more question, or share a reflection on what it had made her think about. Sometimes we academics are a bit complainy. Being around Arta is such a good reminder of what an unrelenting joy in learning feels like, and what it can and should be.
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| Gillian and Uumati |
Sent from the traditional territories of the Songhees, Esquimalt and WSÁNEĆ peoples.
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Tonia Adds:
Thank you Gillian for your beautiful words, incredible research, and being a part of our family!
You can purchase Polygamy's Rights and Wrongs by Gillian Calder and Lori B. Beaman by clicking on the book's title. I am ordering it right now!
This post gave me great comfort as I woke today and wished I could speak with Arta. I was lucky to receive a wake-up call from her yesterday morning. One of her messages after a rough night was that she was feeling optimistic, and ready to seize the day (a reference to her friend Lorraine Wright's advice on living).
ReplyDeleteShe asked if David was awake. He wasn't, but he was in mere seconds as I bolted up the stairs and thrust the phone into his face. She told him she loved him, and that she hoped he would have a great day. She suggested he spend some time outside, and listen for birds. She also suggested picking up a pencil.
I was reminded of when he was five and his thoughts didn't match what his hand could do with a pencil. That made drawing and printing uninspiring to him. I didn't know how to support him. She helped me set up a writing station in the kitchen. At night after he fell asleep she would draw or print note to him. She would leave a tempting aspect to it, to invite him to pick up a pencil without pressuring him to do so. In the morning we left him to interact with the "writing gift" from her or not.
I'm sure you have guessed what happened. It worked like a charm. He began to add his own notes to the station.
Yesterday night when he talked about our morning visit with Arta by phone, David mentioned how strong her voice sounded. It reminded him of when he was little and she would call him up and pretend to be an animal. They would have long visits. She even created an email account for this fictional animal and sent him emails from it from that animal, tiger I think. She also sent him a set of wooden carved animals in a weaved wooden box. It is one of the precious childhood things he has not let me repurpose at the clinic. I didn't know he had memories of her pretending to be an animal in phone calls.
Thanks for your post, Gillian. I love you and Uumati.
Lot of love, Bonnie. Keeping you all in my thoughts. xox
ReplyDeleteAmazing experiences Bonnie! You have highlighted one of the amazing skills Arta, Wyona, and Moiya have had their whole lives: see a skills a child need that requires practice, then create spaces in which the child will want to improve their skills in a fun and creative way. I have seen so many of the extended Pilling children benefit from these quiet intervention and skill building opportunities by Arta, Wyona, and Moiya. We are all so fortunate!
ReplyDeleteYes. I never knew how much panning was going on in the background. They make it look so spontaneous.
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