Tuesday, January 21, 2020

Marilyn Kearl 1925 - 2029

Her daughter, Kathy, sang the song (about her),
"More than Enough"
Greg and Wyona picked me up to go to Marilyn Kearl’s funeral on Saturday at the Crescent Road Chapel. Greg watches the obituaries in the Calgary Herald. That is how we knew to go to the funeral.

I first knew Marilyn Kearl because she sang in a trio with my mother and her sister in law, Ruth. They mostly sang at funerals. There aren’t a lot of other places for trios to sing unless they sing in church. They were asked to sing often and soon my dad would be shaking his head and making some comment about the type of music they were singing, and of course pratising, for I can remember all three of them gathered around the piano and practising.

Marilyn’s dates were 1925 – 2020 which would have made her 95 years old. After those early memories about her singing in a trio with my mother and Ruth, the most vivid memories I have of her is over the years at funerals. Harold and Ruth attended funerals, at least all of the ons I went to. I began to expect to see them there, always together when they talked to you, always friendly and reminiscing about the past, for they knew everyone who had been in my past, as well as many others, I am sure.

Three of her sons spoke. A grandchild played a piece. Her daughter sang. I wanted to say something about the talks. I don’t think I have ever heard talks at a funerals so consistently elevated, but delivered to the mourners and to the audience in such a way as to make all feel welcomed and indeed, adored. And this was also true of the way they felt about and talked about their mother. She had faults, one said, and then he went on to say that her teeth had been crooked, but that in the resurrection, those would be straight.   He went on to speak about something else.  I was left thinking, yes, he saw her as perfect except for her teeth and she is the one who wished them to be straight, not he.


... her children and her children's children ...
This is a funeral I want to say more about, a funeral people were talking about the next day at church and one that will be remembered as pretty close to the most perfect funeral a person could want or ever attend.  On the point of wanting such a funeral, it would only have to come if deserved and many women afterward were shaking their head and saying, i don't think that my children will speak of me with as much respect as Marilyn's spoke of her.

Since I may not get back to this, let me try to express my feelings about the funeral today.  The men who spoke did so with such refined language, sometimes refeerring to art or music or referencing literature, but in such a way that Marilyn was always the focus.  The light shone on her and how it shone that day of the funeral.  And this light was reflected back onto her loved ones.

Just a wonderful set of talks, even motivational for me in terms of giving respect to the task of parenting.

Her children probably knew her longer as an adult, than they ever knew her as children, and I think it was this mature relationship with her that was outstanding.

More to come, but today is my day to get a new hip.

Some must wait for the resurrection for straightened teeth.

My new hip?  I get to have mine today.

I am sure Marilyn would approve. 

Straightened teeth for her and a new hip for me, all in the same month.

Arta

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